The friends zone.
Uh-oh. . . . .
Not a good place to be.
You have preconceived ideas about it.
The friends zone gets no love. The relationship zone gets love and it's where all the magic happens.
Like sorting your laundry from a broken plastic laundry basket into lights and darks, there are two possibilities.
Or are there?
Can you reframe how you feel about the friends zone or at least consider that it might be a place to visit or spend some time? A new mindset may be a key to romance for you.
What happens in the friend zone? People become friends. Having friends is lovely. So far, so good.
What is missing from the friends zone? Red hot, mind numbing Sex, of course. The tingles. Physical bonding. A reciprocal desire to see where this leads.
Could it be that the friends zone and the romance zone have a bridge between them? Are they linked?
Some people begin a relationship in the friends zone and then cross the bridge into the romance zone. It takes effort and energy to be curious about each other, feel a mutual connection and discover what each of you like. Common ground. From this friends zone beginning you can each decide to combine your relationship energies in the romance zone. Or go your own ways. No judgment.
What will grant or deny you unlimited access in the friends zone and the romance zone?
Your expectations.
Your expectations allow you access to the friends zone or allow you access to the romance zone. An open mind will help you go between both zones: back and forth. Being comfortable in both zones will serve you well no matter your relationship status.
In many long term love relationships, sex happens in phases. Reality. Sex might be full on or it might be infrequent for a week, or a month or several months in your long term relationship. If you are able to navigate between zones, you won't lock yourself into a narrow concept for happiness.
Imagine you are not in a relationship now.
If you expect "The One" to arrive in your life and understand, nurture, protect and shower you with gifts, attention and soul shaking love, you are placing an unrealistic intention on the people you meet. Your keep the friends zone and romance zone harshly separate for yourself in your head and heart with your expectations.
The people you meet automatically and immediately fall into the friends zone or the romance zone. Done deal. Over. Next. Just like laundry, only two possibilities.
Is that fair? Fair to you? Of course not.
How many times have you met someone and immediately and judged them? And disliked them? Be honest. Have any of your solid friendships begun with no expectation and/or a negative or slightly off connection? Did a connective friendship develop between you?
No expectation (not standards -keep your standards as you like them) allows a connection to develop between you and the people you meet naturally. With ease. Honestly.
As you release your limiting expectations, you feel lighter. Uncover and unlearn what drains, exhausts and hurts you. A happier you is attractive.
Like the mid-range colors in your laundry that wash together, see new possibilities for yourself to expand.Open space for new relationships. Friendships, love relationships and all the beautiful connections in between belong in your basket of joy.
For more of this grab a free copy of your free guide:
5 Steps to Find Your Forever Love Even if You Hate Dating Games at https://optimizedrelationships.com/free
my website: https://optimizedrelationships.com/optin
Photo by Raka Rachgo on Unsplash
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