There are thousands of facets to a romantic relationship breakup
Healing is what I will talk about here
Healing and grieving physically, emotionally, intellectually
I know you don’t want to hear this and you already know
All take time
Creating a love relationship takes time
Naturally, letting go of your relationship takes time
It’s a process you can survive if you have the will to move forward and
You are honest, loving and kind to yourself
Honesty and expressing yourself will help you heal
Where do you begin?
Maybe with tears
Maybe with anger
Definitely - with letting go of some of your old information and
beliefs about love relationships
They hurt
Start right here, right now and do the tough work to feel better from
now on
Assess your relationship now, in the present moment, in this very
second
Forget about the past and what has happened up until this moment
Forget about attachment
Forget about trying to read behavior and clues
Stop playing the good times over and over in your head
Help yourself feel better
Close your eyes and ask yourself:
Does your relationship feel loving to you right now?
In this minute?
If it does, why are you breaking up?
Read on
If it does not, why do you want more of it?
Do you have your answers?
Next, have you been seeking the love you dream of outside of yourself?
Through your partners?
Like society said
In seeking love outside of yourself, does it feel like this person is
your only source of love?
No judgment here
If your major source of love leaves, it is excruciating
Turns your life upside down
Won’t let you sleep
Upsets your gut
Are you miserable because the other person didn’t love and appreciate
you like you know you should be loved and appreciated?
Feel this
You put the responsibility for your heart in someone else’s hands
Gasp
And they didn’t love you like you know you are worthy
Ouch!
This is like asking someone else to work out for you, so you feel
energized and fit
Wow
I did it
It hurts deeply
Can you use this pain?
Your pain
To learn to feel better on your own?
To stop looking, hoping and wishing this person will make it better?
To self soothe
So, this doesn’t happen again?
Consider this and this is BIG:
The love you have inside your heart now is your biggest strength
Your super power
Your love is not your weakness
Give this love to yourself
Love turned inward heals
Your unhappiness now is calling you to remember who you are in your
heart
Your greatest honor, growth and joy arrive when you take responsibility
for your own heart
And appreciate and love yourself so that you can show someone else how
to appreciate and love you
Without needing them to
Neediness is too great a burden to bear
Self-love is a game changer
Please rest now and
Heal up
And chose to love again
Or not
From honoring what makes you forever loveable
From FEELING the love you have in your heart and using it to feel
better
Your love experiences help you rise
Not destroy you
When you are ready
Dry your tears
And thank them for where they lead you
Love On,
Risa Kelley
Optimized Relationships
p.s.- I have a free 5 Step Love Guide to help you with embrace more
self-love. Click here to receive it: http://bit.ly/5stepLoveGuide
Photo by Filip Bunkens on Unsplash
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